The Squirrel Chronicles

From Wikipedia

A year or two ago, I noticed that there was a lot of activity going on above the baby room. I mentioned something to Brad about it, but he didn’t seem too concerned since it wasn’t affecting us too much. Then, during the winter months, the scratching and pitter-patter noises began again — but this time, I could hear them in my walk-in closet (where I sit and do my scrapbooking). It was pretty noisy, but once again, Brad didn’t appear too concerned. The morning when the squirrel(s) woke us up with their “talking” and excessive noisiness, Brad asked me to take care of it.

Apparently there are a lot of companies out there that take care of these critters. Unfortunately, I think I chose the most ineffective (aka least expensive) one. It cost $100 for the squirrel guy (Bill) to come out and do an initial consultation. Most others charged more than this, or more for each squirrel (or other critter) caught. He immediately found two half-dollar (at most) sized holes on two sides of our house, leading into our attic. Squirrel Guy definitely found traces of squirrel food debris in the front portion of the attic. Apparently this was the work of the notorious red squirrel (a squirrel that’s pretty small, red, and looks like a baby) which is known in the wild, wild world of animals for being a nuisance.

About 4 weeks ago, Squirrel Guy set up a couple of lethal traps with peanuts all over them in the front portion of our attic. The next morning, we didn’t awaken to any sounds. We were excited. Squirrel Guy said he’d return the next day but didn’t. So, I called to get him out to our house, secretly hoping our ordeal was finally over. Upon his examination, he found that the squirrel hadn’t even touched the food. He left, but forgot to tell me when he’d return. After two days of no Squirrel Guy, I called the office again. He returned to find, once again no trap set off. We decided to try the back portion of the attic, where the scratching noises seemed to be originating from. Squirrel Guy said he’d be back on Wednesday morning to check it out. Of course, he didn’t show up. He arrived Thursday. Nothing. He said he’d be back on Saturday morning, and if nothing was caught, he would just patch up the holes (and charge us $50 of course).

Well, Squirrel Guy didn’t call and didn’t show up that Saturday morning. In fact, he didn’t show up the entire next week. Since I was pretty busy that week, I didn’t bother calling until the following Monday. By then I was irate. I called the main number, and received some apologies and then Squirrel Guy’s cell number. Then I called Squirrel Guy and complained. His excuse was that there had been a lot of new customers for him to see. In addition, he added that he was an airhead when it came to schedules. He promised me he’d be at our house the next morning before 10am. Thank goodness for him, he showed up on time. Of course, no squirrel had even touched the food. He was afraid to patch up the holes because he feared that the squirrel would just puncture more. So he set up traps with peanuts and vanilla wafers right next to the hole above the area where I was hearing the most scratching.

Two days later …. nothing! Finally, Squirrel Guy decided to set up a live trap outside, under one of our trees. On Tuesday morning, I noticed that the trap had moved about 3 feet to the left, and was discharged. I called Squirrel Guy to let him know. By the next morning, the trap had moved another 2 feet. Squirrel Guy returned the trap underneath the tree and placed a brick on top — ha!

Later that afternoon, I noticed that not our red squirrel, but a regular squirrel had gotten itself encased in the trap. He seemed quite upset as he kept digging, trying to get out. I felt horrible! Poor guy was probably hungry and thirsty, and he barely fit inside the trap! It was already 4:45pm, and I couldn’t get ahold of Squirrel Guy. So, after consulting with Amy and Lisa, I decided to give him some walnuts, Ritz crackers, and bird seed. Since there was no way in heck that I was about to open the cage to place water inside, I made two holes into a gallon of water and stuck two straws inside. The poor squirrel got some water out of the straw, but then after gnawing on it, the straw came right out of the gallon. I tried calling Squirrel Guy again around 8pm. He called back, and said he’d just release the guy since he wasn’t our main target. I feared that there was a chance that this could possibly be our aggressor, so I asked Squirrel Guy to release him to the wild. Of course I would be charged, but I just wanted to experiment and see if this could be our trouble maker. Plus, this squirrel was mad, and I didn’t want him in our yard any more after capturing him!

So here we are, back to square one. The cage is empty. I haven’t heard any scratching yet since Wednesday night, but I have a feeling we will soon.

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